Tips For Changing The Behavior Of A Negative Child

Our children are the foundation of our lives and mean everything to us. Yet, things are often not as rosy as one might hope.  Even though we might consider ourselves positive people, home life is stable and our children have numerous opportunities, we sometimes have a child that has developed a negative attitude.  As a parent, you may not be sure where this behavior is coming from but are eager to improve the way the child is behaving.  This is all part and parcel of the parenting experience and one has to swiftly adapt by being open to new techniques that enhance the development of the child. Here are four tips on how to parent a negative child with the goal of completely eradicating the behavior.

Tip #1: Guide the Child

Simply ordering the child to change their behavior will reap minimal rewards. Address the negative behavior and make your child aware that it is affecting everyone around them.  Then take the time to give examples of what is perceived as 'positive' behavior. Explain how they could have handled the situation differently and looked at it from a more positive perspective.  Parents can be role models by maintaining a positive state of mind in their daily lives.

With continued support and guidance, a child will slowly begin adapting to these changes in mannerisms. It is possible to learn new behavior, especially if it is corrected at a young age.  Most children will enjoy the positive responses they get from those around them and will slowly begin to change their attitude. 

Tip #2: Learn to Ignore at Times

This can be tough. It is understandable for parents to punish their child or scold them as an initial reaction when a child misbehaves or possesses a negative attitude.

However, sometimes it is best to simply ignore the comments, bad attitude or outburst. Of course, one should not be ignoring their child, but ignoring the child’s bad mood goes a long way in eradicating negative behavior.  Many pediatricians suggest simply walking away from the situation.  If the child notices there is no response to their temper tantrum, they will eventually adopt methods in which they receive a positive response.

Tip #3: Find the Root Cause

Children are not always straightforward with their feelings. At times, there are underlying emotions that have become the root cause for their behavior. Perhaps, the child is adapting to their parents' methods of handling anger? There are times when the child might be feeling uneasy in another part of their life and taking it out through negative behavior. These are all considerations that have to be made by parents upon noticing their child’s developing negative attitude.

Just like an adult who has had a bad day at work, children can have bad days at school. They may have gotten into a fight with a friend or are being bullied. A parent should be looking to pinpoint the underlying cause and attempting to solve the problem. Do not always take things at face value because sometimes there is more going on.

Tip #4: Give Examples of Other's Bad Behavior

It is extremely important that the lines of communication are wide open to help address this behavior.  Some children strongly respond to examples of how their behavior compares to others.  Making a comparison with another child or person can become the solution to your problem. If a child is told they are behaving like someone else, who they know is inappropriate or that no one likes to be around, they will be taken aback and attempt to change ways.

Keep in mind that the child may initially become defensive and angry in this conversation.  The point is to use this method when the behavior has gone over the line and other solutions are not working effectively.

As we all know, it is difficult to take criticism.  It will take patience and dedication to jump on the negative behavior and handle it in a calm and loving way.  To further delve into how to properly handle your child’s behavior, online parenting courses can prove to be extremely beneficial.  As adults, we are constantly reading, taking classes and trying to improve ourselves at work, online, or for other self-improvement needs.  Online classes to improve parenting skills are a low-cost, convenient and relaxed way to learn new techniques. With further education and the proper implementation, you will begin to notice positive differences in your child over time.