Last week we got a call from a client who was a bit distressed. She was recently remarried to a man who has full custody of his two children. She has one child and they are now one big blended family. They had dated for a couple of years and they have all spent a great deal of time together. However, now that they are all living under one roof, she is really noticing that her new husband’s parenting style is different than she expected. He is lot more strict and controlling than she had ever witnessed on weekend get togethers in the past. She was calling because she wants the two of them to get on the same page now, and was wondering if our classes cover the different parenting styles. She felt that if the information was disseminated from a legitimate source, other than herself, he might be more open to changing his ways.
The answer to her was yes. A parenting class could definitely be beneficial to this newly married couple with kids ranging in age from 6 – 11 years old. It’s always important that both parents are consistent and agree on what is acceptable behavior. Once this is decided upon, then the consequences for improper behavior should be clearly communicated to all children so they know what the parameters are. Children actually thrive on this consistency and structure and it will help create a more cohesive family environment.
There are actually 4 main parenting styles that psychologists agree on. They include Authoritarian, Authoritative, Permissive and Uninvolved. The caller was convinced that her husband would fall under the Authoritarian category in which the kids are expected to follow strict rules that he has established. “It seems to be his way or the highway!” she said. This might have worked when he was a single parent, but she was hoping that he could learn more about the Authoritative style and change his ways a bit. In this style, children are also expected to follow rules set by the parents; however, there is more give and take. Children can be assertive and the parents in this picture are willing to listen and respond to their opinions. The mom who called in was really hoping that he would hand over some control and help create a more democratic household.
The other issue she had was that he wasn’t open to going to a traditional classroom to learn parenting skills. He works all week and wants his weekends to relax at home, not march off to some class. This is the perfect scenario for taking an online parenting course. Her husband was open to the discussion but not to participating in a classroom full of strangers. Online parenting classes can be taken from the comfort of home from any web-based computer. Parents can sit together and learn the information in the quiet and privacy of their own home. This environment enables participants to talk about topics and issues that arise as they scroll through the course. They can sit for however long they’d like and enter and exit the class at their own pace. Taking an online parenting class will provide them the most current education on parenting, at an affordable price and without having to worry about babysitters, teacher’s schedules, or driving across town. She was sold on the idea and purchased a 10-hour class to start this weekend!